The Stutter

As I was walking to class, this short and perky brunette ran up to me and taped me on the shoulder.

"Hey there! I'm Becca… Are you new?"

"Y-y-y-ye-yesss-yes," the second I spoke, she looked at me as if I had a disease. "My n-na-nam-name i-is B-b-brr-bra-brad-d."

"Oh, um, nice to meet you…" she said as she started to walk away, obviously not wanted to be seen with me.

Whatever. Someone at this school won't mind my speech. Someone at this school will be my friend. Someone at this school will understand me.

I walked into homeroom.

Becca stares at me, along with other eyes sending looks of pity. And then someone shouts.

"Look Becca! It's your retarded boyfriend!"

Laughs soon followed. I sit down at my desk, my face obviously red from embarassment, and pull out my notebook and a pencil. I begin to write.

They listen

But they do not

Understand

They do not understand

The h*** I've already

Lived through

Breathed through

And spoke through

They listen

But

They do not

Understand

I know I'm no Robert Frost but when I write, I feel free. Whoever reads my words, won't focus on my literal voice. They focus, on what is true. They focus on what is important. And they forget for a moment that I stutter. They forget for a moment that I am different. Different and a stutter, not mentally challenged.

When I write, I am understood.

Pressure

If a nail is hit, one too many times, the surface, of which it is entering, will crack. Just as if a shoe, is worn too often, its very sole becomes worn, and broken down. Even air pressure, when it becomes high, can break our ear drums, making it impossible to hear a voice of reason.  A solution? One does not exist, and will never exists. Pressure comes from authority. From friends. From any force, that we submit to. Pressure. It cracks us. It wears us down. It breaks us. 

Point of View

Author's Note:  In the song "Little Talks", by Monsters of Men, there are two points of view. There's a wife. And her dead husband, as a ghost. Although, since the husband is slightly over-powered, I found him more intriguing to write about. That being said, this is a short response to show my understanding of POV.

The only way to tell the whole story is to hear both sides, both points of view, from both people.  This being said, the point of view, of which a story is told, truly influences its reader. Is the narrator unreliable? Or telling the truth? How many details are you given? "Little Talks", by Monsters of Men is a perfect example, of two sides being told, two points of view, from both people.

The Widow.

She lives alone, in a big, empty house, ever since her husband died. Often thinking thoughts like, "The stairs creep as you sleep, it’s keeping me awake". At this part of the song, her point of view tells the reader that she is alone, that her husband deserted her, and she is trying to communicate with him, yet he only sleeps. She is frantic and frustrated. But she doesn’t know that her husband truly does care, making her an unreliable narrator, with a swayed point of view.

The Dead Husband.

He sees her, franticly living on her own, and tries to comfort her. When she speaks of the stairs creaking, he hears her and responds saying, "It’s the house telling you to close your eyes". He truly wishes for her to sleep in peace, yet she hasn’t ever heard him, since he has passed. Only he knows both points of view, seeing as he is constantly trying to prove his presence to his wife. He is the reliable narrator, the one who knows both opinions, both stories. His point of view comes after examining the pieces.

Both characters sung about in "Little Talks" have a unique point of view, based from the husband's death. But if the husband's voice wasn’t heard, it would leave the listener to believe the wife was truly abandoned. Although, if the wife's point of view was removed, the husband would seem insane, making him unreliable.

Truly, the story's point of view, affects the reader.

Short Scene:

Mom says the house is empty. Ever since Dad died. But it's full. I'm here. Well, every Friday at least. My job requires a lot of attention. And no one else ever cares to stop by. It's probably because they couldn’t handle seeing her, in the state she's in. She's just so, um, frantic. I mean just two days ago I went to check on her, and she was in her bed. Just lying there, with no sense of emotion running through her face. I asked her how she was doing, and she said she heard noises. And felt as if someone was trying to contact her. Someone. Someone who's dead. If only I could tell her, it was dad. If only I could tell her how much he hates seeing her upset, and going crazy. But I cannot. I simply can't tell her I'm a medium.  That dad was spoken to me. That his presence remains in the house. That he tries to communicate with her. That he wishes to see her, but only when it's time for a "ship to carry her to shore". Dad had always liked metaphors. Anyway. It would only make her state worse. Make her think, she isn't special enough to hear her husband. Make herself fall asleep forever. I couldn’t be responsible for that. So I carry the burden. I carry it. I see mom crazy, and unable to sleep. But my dad does too. And it hurts him as well.

Themes in "The Patriot" and "Just Jane"

Author's Note: This is an essay comparing the themes of The Patriot and Just Jane. I originally wrote it for social studies although, I realized it can also be scored on the writing/reading rubric.

What if you lived in the Revolutionary War? Would you long to gain knowledge of the war, and its soldiers, or remain a naïve citizen? How would you treat your children? Would you follow the themes of The Patriot or Just Jane? The main similarity, in The Patriot and Just Jane, in theme, is, “becoming aware”. However a difference in themes, includes: “trusting children” versus “over-protective guardians.”

When Benjamin Martin, the main character in The Patriot, thought he was aware of The War, and it’s soldiers, he was asked if he was a Patriot.  He responded, “If you mean by patriot, am I angry about taxation without representation, well, yes I am”. Yet he still believed war should not be an option for the colonies. Although, once Gabriel, his eldest son, briefly returned from The War he learned more of the British Army. He learned that they fought unfairly. He learned what they truly fought for was worse than it had seemed. He became aware of what The War truly was, and that he was deeply needed. (Emmerich)

Jane Prentice, the main character in Just Jane, moved from England to live with her Uncle Robert, a true loyalist. She was surprised when her uncle’s travels forced her to live with her other relatives, who were patriots. Being new to the colonies, Jane quickly learned about both sides, and their specific beliefs.  She learned of her Uncle Hugh’s patriot thoughts, and her Uncle Robert’s, loyalist thoughts. She listened to others. She learned of the conflicts. She developed her own opinion after truly becoming aware of The War. (Lavender)

 Benjamin Martin, the widowed father of seven, truly cared for his children yet he had always been unsure of what to allow his children to do. He never wanted his two eldest sons to join the Continental Army, but later allowed Gabriel to enlist. This leads to Thomas, his second eldest son’s, death. This gave Benjamin a change of mind causing him to make his younger son shoot a marching group of “red-coats”. But I guess once someone dies, you learn that you cannot shelter your children forever. Therefore Benjamin began to trust his children. (Emmerich)

Jane Prentice’s Uncle Robert and Aunt Clarissa, loved Jane yet never gave her freedom. She could not go where she please. And she could not, publically, believe what she believed. So when Jane developed her own opinion, her curiosity grew and she was put in the position to sneak away to see her Uncle Hugh. Although, this gave her Uncle and Aunt a reason not to trust her, they still wished to shelter her from what truly was occurring in the war, and in their family. They over-protected her, only wanting her to think loyalist thoughts. They did trust her. However, they did not want her exposed. (Lavender)

                The Patriot and Just Jane share an important theme, along with themes that are not so similar. However, each taking place in the Revolutionary War every character gains different perspectives, due to their different experiences. Theme is decieded from characters. Theme is developed from setting. Theme is developed by perspective.

Bibliography

Lavender, William. Just Jane. Gulliver Books Harcourt, 2002.

The Patriot. Dir. Roland Dr. Emmerich. 2000.

Theme of Lies and Deciet

Author's Note: This is a theme analysis on New Moon by Stephanie Meyer. 

Nobody in the world is 100% truthful. Not with themselves,  and certainly not with others. We deceive our minds. We begin believing our lies, and other's lies, turning life into a game of deceit and confusion. In New Moon by Stephanie Meyer, we find that Bella and Edward are playing this unfortunate game. Edward deceives himself, along with Bella, leaving Bella to lie to almost everyone left in her life. With all of this said, one of the main themes in New Moon is deceit/lies.

               

                Edward deceives himself, along with Bella.

                Edward wanted Bella in his life. Yet he convinced himself that she would be better off without him. He said to her, “My world is not for you”, making her believe he truly doesn’t want her, that he definitely has no soul. At first Bella finds it difficult to believe this, but as soon as he left her stranded in the forest it all fell into place, she realized he had dug a hole through her, leaving her to suffer in depression . Edward always claims he is too dangerous for Bella, making him think that she’s better off without him. He knows she’ll be devastated. Yet he deceives himself saying that “humans move on”. But even when Bella tried to move on, she found more lies and deceit.

                Bella deceives, well, everyone.

               

Bella was deceived, causing “a hole through her heart”, that grew deeper and deeper. But at the beginning of a dig is always overlooked because no one knows the cause. In the beginning of her depression, after Edward left, she began to shut out her close friends, and even her dad. Then Jacob was there. Bella used him. And she knew it because she thought to herself, “I was so wrong to encourage Jacob” as she made him believe she may finally like him more. And he was unaware of have deceitful Bella could be in such a depressive state.

                New Moon teaches us—

“If you cannot tell the truth about yourself, you cannot tell it about other people”

               

We Are Admirable

  Author's Note: This is my essay on Hester Prynne from The Scarlet Letter. Spoiler Alert: In this essay I mention who the "baby-daddy" is!      

      Imagine that you live in a Puritan Society, waiting for your husband to return, yet you remain young and beautiful. You have always been a good citizen, followed the rules set by God. And your reverend. You live a perfect Puritan life. Then, you commit a sin, you fall short of the expectations set for you to live by. Now you, and your child, are outcasts: underneath the shadow of your fellow adulterer, Reverend Dimmesdale.  He begs, and begs, for you to admit it was he, who had helped her commit this sin, but you refuse.  This is your punishment, and although the circumstances prove otherwise, you are an admirable person.

Imagine you are Hester Prynne, in Nathaniel Hawthorne's, The Scarlet Letter.

           Hester Prynne is an admirable woman. She is generous. She is bold. And most importantly she is a good single-mother. Hester is been all of these things, even seven years after the first time she wore the scarlet 'A' publically. Although, she is ridiculed constantly, she chose to stay near the town she had known for so long, but on the out-skirts of coarse. It was familiar to her, one of the only things left near her that couldn’t "ruin" her life.

           And because she had struggled in society herself, Hester sewed clothes for the poor. Being a fantastic seamstress, it was truly an act of kindness, especially sense she didn’t charge them. This was an act to repay her sins, with God and herself. It made her feel Godly. And like a good person again, until she remembered she bore a scarlet letter upon her breast.  The 'A' would never truly leave her. But the acts of citizenship masked the pain, the letter pressed. It lightened the load. It made her happy. It made her proud.

          Although Hester is proud of her donations, she isn't proud of the scarlet embroidery she must wear. Yet she continues to be bold, taking the ridicule, and speaking up when appropriate. As she walked from the prison door, she surely knew of what the gossips had said. Their stares burned into her cheeks, showing her embarrassment. Although, she walked quietly by them, not starting a dispute of any kind. On the other hand, when Governor Bellingham threaten to take Pearl, Hester's daughter, into the custody of another, Hester spoke of what the letter, and its shame, will teach her daughter and ends up keeping Pearl in her custody.

           Her fight for  Pearl proves that she is a strong single-mother. And that she allows Pearl to express her own opinion, whether out of fear or respect. Although, Hester had began to believe Pearl was of the Black Man (what Satan was referred to in the 17th century), she didn’t let that possibility change the affection she had for Pearl. Yet Pearl could be a pain. She always decorated the scarlet letter, and even kissed it at times. Even though, Hester repeatedly mentioned it was bad. Pearl wanted to know why, and like any child she wanted her way. But Hester knew better than to give her wildly-spoken child all of the information.

Go back to imagining you are Hester Prynne. An outcast. An adulteress. A generous yet bold woman. A strong mother. A role model. There is no need to imagine anymore. We are all Hester. We sin. We give. And we are admirable.

Roots

Authors Note- This is a "mini-essay" about technology in the United States, and how much we crave it. This also includes some references to Fahrenheit 451 by Ray Bradbury- a genius author. Enjoy :)

Values in our country continue to worse, day by day, and year by year. New technology is the thing we most desire, we work for it. It buries itself deeper into our lives. Forming roots  deeper, needing more products to remain satisfied. Why do we work so hard, only to become weakened by our desperation? We are no longer focused on what used to be important? Books. Plays. Articles. Learning from life experiences.  Why have we gone so down hill? Why is technology so deeply rooted into our lives?

January 24, 1984: the date the Macintosh was released by Apple. This was the seed of our obsession. The thing that caused the roots to start to grow. This piece of technology replaced our writing notebooks, pencils, and pens. It made life easier, and inspired an era of new technology. If the Macintosh was not created- Apple would cease to exist, along with Dell.  Without these companies the U.S. would continue to research in books. Read them. Have more intelligent conversations. Things that are very difficult to do, when there are so many roots constricting you.

In Ray Bradbury's Fahrenheit 451, which takes place in a futuristic United States, technology continues to be rooted in to everyday life. However,  the strength of the roots has overtaken human intelligence, brainwashing them into thinking books are evil. Televisions are more craved than before as well. Each household aspires to have four walls of TVs. Without these symbols, they are considered poor- outdated. They neglect the books they once knew, as the roots continue take money putting it towards selfish and foolish goals.

Ray Bradbury predicted what is to come, and what has become. This book was published in 1953-- 31 years before the Macintosh planted itself into our lives. He saw the 1925 version of television. He saw it would become a problem. He knew roots must be weakened. He did not want the United States to become too reliant.

 Unfortunately, we now are reliant on televisions. Computers. iPods. Everything that is not important. Everything that Fahrenheit 451 predicted. If we do not learn from his, accurate descriptions of what is to come- the roots will be stronger, making it ever so difficult to break free. We are deeply rooted in to technology, and it will only worsen over time.